I Am Not A Choice Of My Husband, But My In-Laws !!

Today, it is the third day in a row, when we had a fight over a small thing. We both had heated arguments and we ended not talking to each other for a couple of hours. However, we were on talking terms soon, without discussing the fight and leaving the matter there only.

Ours was a typical arrange marriage. Our parents came in touch through some matrimonial portal. A date was fixed when the boy and the girl will meet along with their families, in a month’s time. We did not fall in love the first time we met. Our story is not a “Happily–Ever-After”.Three years down the line, I wonder we both accepted to be together forever. I am not sure if I love him or I have got used to him over these years.

Marriage is the most real thing one lives through.

We have innumerous fights in these three years, but we never settled down to a solution. I am very much emotional and he, being a practical person, never try to go back and look into finding the issues. We just move on. And this is creating more spaces between us.

He is always busy with his work. And the problem aggravates when he does not share his feelings or emotions with me. We have never had a discussion on our future. His priorities are different and I am just following him as I don’t have the courage to face the unknown future.

Am I wrong in saying that what I need is a little effort on his part where he expresses his love to me (even in the smallest gesture by giving me a hug someday) and listens to me, as a Friend and not Husband???

There are problems in every family and our family is no different. If I am trying to adapt, shall I expect that he will at least support me and encourage me, even if the relatives don’t approve of my effort??

Walking out of the fight brings our temper down, but never actually solves the problem. And I wonder, if I will ever see love for me in his eyes or just be his wife as his parents have chosen me for him?


This post is inspired by a friend who is having some troubles in her marriage. She wants some advice, do you have any suggestions???


Today is Day 21 of the #DailyChatter by BlogChatter.



6 thoughts on “I Am Not A Choice Of My Husband, But My In-Laws !!

  1. mindreflectionsblog says:

    This is not just an arranged marriage problem but i have seen it happening in love marriages too. The option would be to sit and talk to him in a way that he understands. If not understanding he should at least know what she wants and feels, Communication is the biggest hurdle that marriages see nowadays. Talking is very much needed!


  2. arv! says:

    It’s a common problem. reasons include differences in the way men and women see each other as well as personal differences. Bring out the topic when he is in a mood to talk, may be things can be discussed better that way!! Hoping that things work better for you both!


  3. Neha says:

    Such problems are common. I suggest her to write down all that she feels and hand it over to her husband. Tell him to read and understand as she feels they aren’t communicating enough. This way she will get it out there in the open and even if her husband doesn’t know how to express, would know her painpoint and try finding a solution. He too might be struggling with similar thoughts without knowing how to express them without an argument


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